Today was a confusing, hectic, emotionally testing day. Someone I loved, love... used to be with came back into my life. I hadn't heard from him in months, and then he was there. Part of me still wants that, and part of me wishes that I could throw it away. I am torn, emotionally. Between a man I've loved since I met him, who brought out the best in me, and a man who challenges my intelligence and psyche. I am torn between so much lately. But work is a constant. A physically trying experience that continues to make me smile in a way. I am glad I can have the constant of the people that come into my work, the customers. They're funny and they make me smile. Its lovely. Reassuring, that the world still turns.

Work tonight was good. Busy. But I got quite a lot done. I still find it funny how my family call me up when I'm there and tell me to get them booze. A call tonight from my mother, asking me to get her Martini. A call yesterday from my dad, asking me to get him Whiskey. No incredibly lewd comments this evening... just a lot of rain. It was lovely in a way... the way it battered the doors. I made as many excuses as I could to walk across the road in it. I think of the song by the Doors, "Riders of the Storm" and I think about how beautiful and peaceful it is... and how somehow we relate ourselves to songs. Thoughts or feelings or actions. I know that you hear a lot of people say that... "That song is SO about me" (invocation of annoying tenny bopper, here), but there is just something about the tranquility of that song...

Another day, another dollar. Today's panties: Hot pink boylegs. Yeah.